This is my mantra right now. When necessary, it is shortened to “one hour at a time” or “one minute at a time.”
As you might guess, there is very little crafting activity going on right now. And very little housecleaning, for that matter. There is, however, lots and lots of frenzied thinking about food — of both the “what can I possibly eat right now?” and “why on earth did I eat that?” variety. I really appreciate all of the suggestions you gave me regarding things to eat, but I’m having a small problem in that something rarely tastes good for more than one or two days in a row. Lemonade was delicious for a few days last week, but now I have no interest in it. Ditto french fries, salad, cranberry juice, and biscuits. I am giving ginger ale another try, but it completely lost its appeal for quite a while.
In short, I am running out of things to eat. And this creates a problem when I know that I will probaby feel a little better if I eat something. On the plus side, I have finally started throwing up. It may sound strange, but this is a rather big relief: I know that it doesn’t make you feel a whole lot better, but it is infinitely more satisfying than gagging over and over again, which has been the story of my life for the last few weeks.
I’m sorry to have nothing to post about besides pregnancy, but this has been the biggest subject of my thoughts lately. I am proud to day that I haven’t missed a day of school yet. If I can manage to get to school (the hardest part), I usually find that teaching consumes so much of my attention that I don’t have a lot to spare to think about how I am feeling. On the down side, I still feel crummy enough that I don’t think that I am the best teacher right now. But, a teacher giving 75% still accomplishes more than a substitute, right? (Or so I keep telling myself…)
Husband has been very supportive in all this and hasn’t minded at all that I have taken up semi-permanent residence on the couch. He encouraged me last night with two things that I thought I would pass along. First, pregnancy-suffering is real suffering that can be offered up to the Lord. For every hour that I feel nauseated, I can ask God to take it and transform it into something else: my healthy baby. Second, I am discovering for myself how women will be saved through childbearing. I’ve been to churches where this was kind of controversial, but I take great hope in the idea that, as I don’t use it as an excuse for self-pity or complaining, the current unpleasantness is working to sanctify me from the inside out.
Finally, no matter how I may feel that this is never going to end, I am so grateful that there is a distant finish line in sight. My mother has warned me that, on her side of the family, the second trimester tends to be no better than the first. But even if this is the case, there is no way that I am going to be morning sick after the baby is born. Right??